Campho Phenique Couldn't Fix This.

Adventurous, Daring, Courageous, Smart. Those are just a couple of adjectives that would describe a movie hero that never suffered any real injuries. If I had to describe myself with a couple of those descriptive terms, I would use. Unlucky, Dumb,Accident-Prone, Stupid or is that the same as Dumb. Anywho. As a kid, I always found myself in the stickiest of situations, which always ended in some type of trauma. But luckily enough, if any of these series of unfortunate events happen at Gramma's House (r.i.p), our Paw Paw(r.i.p) had the fixer upper of all fixer uppers. CAMPHO PHENIQUE. No matter the ailment, our Paw Paw's response was,"Put that campho phenique on it." I don't know if it was will power, pure science or black magic, but most of the time it would work.Man that stuff was amazing, until one hot summer day in SHINEY.
So one day being the unlucky kid that I was, i found myself getting into some type of mischief around gramma's house. Just your normal stuff, kicking cans, stealing plums off the tree,eating syrup sandwiches and what not. Then I decided it was time to go on a bike ride. After searching forever to find one, the only bike on the Girton Manor, was on flat and with out pedals. I didn't allow that discourage me, because I was going to ride it anyway. So as I pedalled and trudged through what was an all gravel drive way, it was close to impossible to get anywhere. THEN...........my foot slips off the metal protruding post where the pedal should be and it goes directly into my cave muscle. That post left a large hole in my leg about the size of cookie which also expose some bone as well. Did I know what to do, HELL NO!!!!! So I just walked inside and found good ole Gus T. Siles. He took one look at the massive wound and said one thing. Yep that's what he said, while i'm think, "Paw Paw, what the hell is that going to do? I look like a fucked up biology experiment." He carefully wiped it and waited for a miracle. Nevertheless i was rushed to the hospital and received 10 stitches and left with a huge scar on my leg. Nice try Camph Phenique, maybe next time.

Dear Telephone, I hate you

As I'm working feverishly to finish my mountain of homework just so I can grade a mountain of papers and projects for my students, I've decided to give my brain a break and let it recall some historical moments in my life.

Growing up, the four of us shared one room. That's right ladies and gentlemen, one room. The room wasn't particularly big, my parents made due with what they had and for that, I am thankful (as I'm sure my brothers are too). We had two sets of bunkbeds, which worked quite well. Wash and I slept on the top bunk (since we were the "smallest") and Mario slept under Wash, and Andre slept under me. So in my parents' infinite wisdom, it was only sensible to allow us to have our own phone line. My brothers were quite popular (athletic stars and all around cool kids), so having access to a phone line was beneficial for both them and my parents.

For a long time, I wasn't too terribly bothered by the phone; I would answer and pass it along to the appropriate brother. I grew up very introverted, so the only phone calls I would receive were from a grandmother or cousin; which within themselves were far and few between. Being the youngest, I also grew accustomed to being my brother's errand boy, so answering the phone was often my one chance to interact with my brothers' friends.

I am not sure if it was a combination of my brothers hormones, or me genuinely being tired of the constant ringing of our phone, but I had reached my breaking point with the phone. The one thing I learned about my oldest brother, is that he is extremely loyal to those he would commit himself to. That often translated into late nights on the phone. He graduated from high school 8 years before me, so with that big of an age difference, it wasn't easy to understand his need to be on the phone. Maybe it just didn't occur to him that I was a light sleeper, or that he laid in the bed under me, or that I had school the next morning; whatever the reason I was often up until he got off the phone (which was usually him falling asleep while on the phone).

One day, I had enough. It was Saturday, I wanted to sleep in, but on top of my brothers going to sleep late, they woke up early. Often to get on the phone. I tried to sleep through it, but my tantrum had set in. I waited until whomever was off the phone. I saw the phone on the floor. I pounced upon it. I wanted it to shatter. I was thinking "I'mma break this hoe". It didn't break, I just hurt my foot in the process. My brothers didn't care about me at all, they cared about that phone. They were also very angry that I had jumped on it from the top bunk. This is war you communication device. You're ruining my sleep, and if I make another A- due to my lack of being able to concentrate because I'm up due to you, then I'm gonna make you wish you hadn't made an enemy out of me.

There have been many phones after that incident. That same phone, I remember intentionally breaking some how. I can only remember Andre finding out that I had destroyed the phone, and him making quick work of me with one swift punch to the stomach. Damn you stomach you've been so good to me, why did you fail me now?!?! Obviously that only made me hate phones more. Over the years, I got more clever about the way I destroyed the phones. Spoiler Alert - When I say clever, it just usually consisted of me going inside of the phone and unhooking some wires. Then after the phone "wasn't working", I would act clueless and let them deal with it. I would get one, maybe two, nights of sleep out of the deal. I could've easily put the wires back in their slots, but I chose not to. I WAS THE FUCKING PHONE GOD, AND IF YOU WANTED THE PHONE TO WORK, YOU'D HAVE TO PLAY BY ANTOINE'S RULES

Eventually all of my brothers were out of the house, and the phone rang once every blue moon, and when it did it was for me. However, the seed of hatred was already planted. Whenever I reached an angry breaking point, it was always the phone's fault. Even today, when I get upset, I will throw a phone. Then it breaks. Then I say "whatever, whoever needs to contact me will get in touch with me somehow". I think Sprint appreciates my business, so you know, you're welcome; you can thank my brothers.

Not sorry. ~!Antoine!~

What's up you "blog hogs"? I wish I had access to Morgan Freeman and his golden voice box to give my introduction a "godly"appeal. But since i haven't seen Morgan since i was a extra in the movie Street Smarts in 1985, i played a 3yr old but i was 4. That's hollywood for you. Im Marieaux Jefferson and i live under water in a sealed bubble dome. On times that i am above sea level and only at that time can i be considered to be the 2nd oldest of the jefferson brothers grimm. I'm pretty sure this will turn out to be a horrible idea, so lets sit back and watch a slow motion train wreck. Oh p.s. I have a time machine that works periodically on February 29th and April 31st. I have only amassed enough energy to go back 6 minutes. Therefore if there are any citizens(illegal aliens) out there in need of a swift redo, feel free to purchase a ticket. Other than that, go blog yourself.

Number 3

What's up world? It seems the fashionable thing to do is introduce myself. My name is Washtaevius Jefferson, but everyone knows me as Wash. I'm the third of four very different dudes that have tons upon tons of silly stuff to share. And i am so excited to share some of those life events with everyone because with any type of event or whatever it may be, there is a lesson that must be learned. FOR BETTER or FOR WORST, a lesson must be learned and you will see that through the timeless classics of this foursome.
A little back story about me, just like Antoine, i also grew up in the hard streets of Shi-town Louisiana, and now live in New Orleans Louisiana, where I run a business. My number one passion in life is LIFE IT SELF. Waking up in the morning is awesome, jamming everything i possible can in the hours that i am allowed in a days time is awesome, being able to simply interact with others is awesome, and (clears throat) i'm single(did i just turn this into a dating service). I really want to share a story but i don't wanna break the trend just yet because i'm a lil more excited to see who will share a story first and what they plan to share. So i will shut up and digress because you will get to know me very will through precise, clear, descriptive story telling.

Peace.

Welcome to the Blog

Why hello there blog world, welcome to the our little place.  My brothers and I have decided that it is unfair of us to not share our life stories with the world, so here we are.  I will allow my brothers to introduce themselves when they share their first story with you.  I will simply introduce myself, and send you on your merry way.

My name is Antoine Jefferson, and I'm the youngest of the 4 of us.  I am also the biggest, and currently do whatever I damn well please.  Originally from Minden, LA, I live in Georgia finishing up a Masters degree in Leadership while working as an instructor at the same university.

It should be known that I love teaching, music, math, taking super naps (just accidentally took a 3 hour nap while writing this), eating food I cooked, being not sorry, and other miscellaneous acts of awesome. I like to think that people will be able to understand that I care about people...without me actually being nice.  Being mean is so much more fun than being nice.  One of my goals in life is to grow old, so I can be angry whenever and whyever I want.  When an old person is angry, no one questions them; I want that lifestyle.  I like being bigger than people, I've grown quite accustomed to my ability to look intimidating.

Although I won't share a story with you in this post, I will let you know that you will notice a recurring theme of me getting into a situation due to my lack of ability to say 'no'.  Sometimes this may be considered a character flaw.  I like to think of it as more of a 'gateway to awesomeness'.  More often than naught, my stories will have nothing to do with my other brothers, and will contain the word hawt (hot) enough times to make you want to punch baby kittens.

So enjoy this blog, and welcome to our real life...